Archive for tunnel

Uwe Boll Planning to make a Movie Based on a Video Game Based on a Movie He Directed?

Posted in Crap Celebs, Video Game Nonsense with tags , , , , , , , , , on September 19, 2008 by youwilldiealone


Above is the trailer for “1968 Tunnel Rats” (it might be “Tunnel Rats 1968” but I’m too lazy to look it up) which is a video game based on a movie by Uwe Boll who is based on someone who doesn’t have talent.  I take that back, he must be doing something right.  To garner as much disdain and anger within countless messageboards and bar conversations means you have achieved some form of infamy.  Anyway, it seems Dr. Boll has added a twist to his “make a movie based on a video game ways” by making a video game based on his movie.

I wasn’t expecting much but the trailer managed to make my jaw drop.  Not in the, “Holy shit! This looks amazing!” way, but in the, “Seriously…” way.

The first third of the trailer made me think you were playing as a renegade sigmoidoscope blasting polyps in a diseased rectum.  As the trailer progressed however, it was clear this was some kind of first person shooter set during war or a bad company outing.  Not quite sure.

Either way, much like Boll’s films this trailer is laughably bad.  It’s mostly gameplay footage which might have been impressive had it been made in 1997.  Interspersed with the footage are important facts about soldiers like, “If you were a soldier in 1968, they would have prepared you to fight in tunnels.”  As we all know, this was indeed important during the 1968 Perth Amboy Tunnel Invasions.

My favorite part of the trailer has to be the final bit where we are told that, “There are things out there nobody prepared you for…” and the ensuing thing we are not prepared to witness.  Apparently your training does not include watching helicopters crash while you are in a position out of harm’s way.  Part of me wonders if that was supposed to be a metaphor for Boll’s career or the developers have a great sense of humor.

The only way this could be great is if after both the movie comes out and after the game comes out, Boll directs a movie based on the game.  Time would then fold upon itself and we’d basically hit the universe’s reset button.

This could be more powerful than the Hadron Collider…